The past century has been flooded with trends and new information surrounding pregnancy, birth, and infant care. From doctors Spock, Lamaze, and Bradley in the ’50s, to the promotion of new technologies such as epidural anesthesia and formula feeding in the ’60s, through various iterations of the natural birth movement in the 70’s and 80’s… From the licensing of non-hospital midwives in the 90’s, to the boom in doulas in the 2000s, through the proliferation of maternity apps in this decade, the “right way” to bring a baby into the world has evolved.
To get grandparents updated on their baby knowledge, Lucile Packard Children’s Hospital sponsors a “Grandparents’ Seminar” as part of its course offerings. As a recent San Francisco Chronicle article notes,”Hospitals commonly offer classes in labor, lactation and baby CPR. But adding grandparents to the mix is a modern twist. It used to be that grandparents didn’t go to classes for advice. They dispensed it.”
The two-hour course covers infant safety, sleep, and feeding. Though most of the class participants were conscientious and up-to-date when they were raising their own children, some accepted practices have changed – babies are now swaddled tightly like burritos, laid to sleep on their backs without pillows, and exclusively breastfed when possible. Umbilical cords are cleaned with water instead of alcohol, the specifications for car seats have changed dramatically, and there is a potentially overwhelming array of new products on the market. Medical communities are increasingly becoming aware of perinatal mood disorders, and informing patients about practices that were once “fringe” – like co-sleeping and intervention-free birth.
The course also touches on the complex emotional issues that come with becoming a grandparent, and offers advice on etiquette – which the course instructor, Marilyn Swarts, a labor and deliver nurse and nurse manager quoted in by the Chronicle, sums up with “Seal your lips.” Parents want their parents involved with the baby, but they also want autonomy and to incorporate modern care practices. Indeed, many people who take the course learned about it through their children.
Swarts has been teaching the course for the nearly ten years it has been offered. In a 2009 interview with a grandparenting blog, she said:
It’s so hard because we’re still in the parent mode and just want to help our children, but they must learn for themselves. Better to ask them: What do you think would be a good solution? I want grandparents to empower the new parents, help them believe they’re the best parents for their child and make them feel comfortable and confident in their new roles.