Last month, we introduced a Scope feature that gives readers the opportunity to ask questions of our medical school faculty and researchers. Fred Luskin, PhD, a research associate at the Stanford Prevention Research Center and co-founder of the Stanford Forgiveness Project, served as our first guest and took questions about why forgiveness is important for health.
Below Luskin responds to a selection of questions submitted via the @SUMedicine Twitter feed using the hashtag #AskSUMed and the comments section on Scope.
Preethi Reddy Chintha asks: What is forgiveness? What does it mean to be able to forgive?
Forgiveness is making peace with not getting what you wanted. It is an open-hearted way of being in your life even though a piece of it turned out differently than you hoped. It is to say something was painful and unwanted but I am not stuck in such remembrance.
@lap201156 asks: What does one need to do to get through the layers of hurt, anger, etc. to get to forgiveness?
First, feel the pain in it’s changing experience. Second, be clear about what happened to you including the harm done. Third, tell a couple of trusted people about your experience. Fourth, make the decision to forgive. Fifth, practice being at peace for moments at a time and do so regularly. Sixth, understand the choice to forgive continues with daily practice.
Kritika asks: How can the failure to forgive increase a person’s risk of heart disease and mental illness?
If a person doesn’t learn to forgive, he or she will lose a sense of efficacy at dealing with life’s hurts. The individual may also tend to become less trusting because they have not found a source of peace within themselves. If there is a physical stress part of the upset, the person may also suffer from stress-related illnesses.
The effects of unregulated stress arising from ongoing negative affect and cognitions, which impacts the nervous, endocrine and cardiovascular systems, can increase a person’s risk of heart disease and mental illness. In addition, the inability to manage one’s emotions leads to helplessness and despair. The mind-body effect can be cumulative and impact, weaken or damage parts of the body. Our work has demonstrated that.
Continue Reading »